Les Riddles

As I stated earlier, this blog won't be used for les awesome poèms only.
Since, I'm not getting enough inspiration (yes, I need inspiration to be lame) for writing the poems, I will proceed with a challenge!
RIDDLES!
YAY!
These are riddles that I made a long time ago..like a LOOONG time ago but I'm putting them up now.
Post your answer in the comments! (Hints in the the pictures beside the riddles)
All the best!

P.S. If you want me to take up some activity like advice columns/ bitching columns etc., let me know! :P

RIDDLE #1
Sleeps on my left and wakes up on my right..
His absence always makes my night..
Bleeds twice everyday..
But remains a shining knight..
Early by 2 minutes each and everytime..


RIDDLE #2

I open at the close
And I close at the open.
For your gain, you must pay with self..
I need no cash, no token.

My duty is to abide
Without any suspicions.
But still I shall know all..
Disregarding your inhibitions.

Yet, I promise a movie full of joy
Maybe with some terror and some toy.
You shall regret if you fully give in to me..
Merely keep in mind, all you need is to be..



RIDDLE#3

A Tomato and a Watermelon
Cut them into half
Look under the table
and know them from afar.
Nope? You don't get it?
Well you can throw an Orange in
And sure enough, it will blend in.
Toss one to the left and the other to the right.
The giant? He has all the might.
Chop off the tops,
And there's your double delight!

LPL Vol III Night I

June 21,2012

21:20
Poem requested by Ishant
For encouragement for his homeopathy examinations

The little white white balls
dipped in 50% di-ols..
Though bigger than his brain,
which can barely stand up to a grain,
Ishant's being forced to do the drill
Without being given any memory pill
And hence his days are all gloom..
where nothing but the nerd will bloom..
So put on your specs!
Stop thinking about gay sex!
Your goal isn't homo-path!
Why couldn't you instead choose math?
But no! You had to do something with human anatomy..
First those dumb Pharms, then this physiology!
Now study! Study you fool!
Think of this as nothing but a tool
For the future, when you'll swim in cash..
And the white balls, you will smash..;)

21:50
Ducks' quacks and the cows' moo

A sample of the epic fail.

To hear them, I don't even have to visit the zoo
I know cows aren't found there
But there was nothing that rhymes so clear
So,I'll continue with the point I was going to make..
Before drinking the martini that I am yet to shake
These animals, though not for sale
are found on facebook, EPIC fail
Available in 'hawt' girls and douche males
But I bet it's better to buy dinosaur tails -_-


22:15
Requested by myself, a poem on admissions!

Stephens ki cut off ninety seven
huh?That's it?Why not hundred eleven?
Admission in DU,admission somewhere
No,you won't take me?As if I care..:x
6000 seats only??
An yet I feel so lonely??
Wait!,how come all my friends got in..
Have I committed such a great sin?
What about my toils?
and the mutual induction of coils?
Why, with me, this nainsaafi?
They don't even deserve my maafi!


June 22, 2012


00:14
Requested by Aanchal,A poem on XII A

Sciencies of Twenty Twelve
In the room without natural light, we dwelve..
3 rows and 1 half..
39 students only knew how to laugh..
Physics class was Lotus Temple
And Chem was full of metter..
Bio mein chanda-paro ki film..
No one cared about being slim
Lunch tak there shouldn't be any tiffin full
To accomplish this, everyone became a bull!
Maths?Hahahaha!you're kidding right?
we didn't even know what was in our sight.
English? Don't even ask mayya..
Boards mei duba di hum sabki nayya!

---------

Les Poèms Lämes Volume II Part II

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March 15, 2011

22:57

Is it time for some serious thoughts?

Is time to call the shots?

Is it time to give up,

When everything around is corrupt?

23:14

A war for something you never owned..

That piece of rock is your gold..

Perfection, pure, divine, serene..

You dive in the middle of nowhere..

Just to win this game..

Realization comes way too late..

And earlier there wasn't any time to wait..

After losing it all..there's no one to share..

You might proudly proclaim..'I don't care'..

But deep down..you regret..what you dared..

23:52

Somethings supposedly reveal all..

But what if the windows to one's soul..

Are all shut..and deaf to any call..?

Would you make some effort..

Or hit them with a pointed pebbles?

That 'one' desires to remain lost..

Would you still remove the gathered moss?

In the middle of a cyclone..

Indifferent to everything in the path..

Interefere..or let them be?

Do the options lie with me?

March 16, 2011

00:38

News I like to know all.

Be it someone's rise..or a hard fall..

One might take it in a negative sense..

But it's time we looked tnrough a different lens..

It gives you the insight into people's lives..

Bad? Na..there are so many times..

When you learn from their toils..

From repeating their mistake..you survive..

As long as used in the manner allowed..

That is..follow the words that you 'vowed'..

From creating ripples, you should refrain..

And that's how ..trust begins..

21:53

The beauty of the color black..

Every description would lack..

Shines as a star..

Dull as a war..

The solitude it harbours..

The crowd it overpowers..

The blinding emptiness..

The cruel fulfillment..

The sins it covers..

The shadows it hides..

So much more it carries..

A saint for some..for others a devil..

Its role in the life..varies

The shimmering dark..

Doesn't fail to make a mark..

Adjectives incorrct?

Nahh..just let black resurrect..

March 19, 2011

22:49

The festival of colors is here to thrill..

Color everyone in sight I will..

'Save water' will be ignored..

As we drown in the Holi ka shor..

With the biggest of smiles..

That stretches to miles..

I wish you Happy Holi!! :D

March 23, 2011

22:43

Requested by Prabahan..on Boards.

So I got a request on boards..

And I'll have to switch between modes..

Boards seem to be terrifying..

Which the fun we have after them is nullifying..

So patiently wait for them to terminate..

And then you can go germinate..

While you wait..for the date..

I'll go eat my birthday cake..

And Prabs..You've got to forgive me,,

For this poem..which does not mean..but is.. 

23:21

On the lines of a chemical equation...

Lie some moles of atoms and elements..

Which are needed for compound preparation..

The electrons just dance about.,

Pure flirts no doubt!

And the poor protons caged..

By the nucleus in a maze..

Will the protons ever be free?

Will they ever themselves be?

Why are the negatives all similar?

And the pluses the serial kilers?

As it is,,birds of a feather flock together..

Man.it's such a boring weather..

22:04

*During some match*

Gautam ganbhir..
I know you're a veer...

But what the fuck were you thinking?

When you decided to run while sinking??

Well from Dhoni I had some hopes..

But it seems the captain couldn't cope..

However, thank god for Yuvraj..

I just wish he saves our laj..

And wtf are aus freaking bowlers doing?

Coming in between the pitch and mooing?

They better get out of the way.

Or in their beds they will sway!

* * * * * * * END OF VOLUME II * * * * * * *

And when I stepped on a lizard, forcing it to let go of its tail, and eventually killing it..its blood on my hands (feet, actually)..I could do nothing..but dedicate him/her a poem..

R.I.P. Lizard..

September 24, 2011

No, this is not the one I killed. I googled this one.
We humans are lucky our dead bodies don't lie around!

22:22

I stepped into the room..

And the world went boom!

A life drained out beneath my feet..

For the second time, I did this deed..

Unintentional it was, I swear..

I shouted and climbed up the bed in fear..

The lizard was no longer there..

And its blood, on my feet, was smeared..

And that, my dear fans, brings us to the end of my old poems..the best poems of 2011.

AND NOW! Since I've absolutely nothing to do but fret over my admission in some college..

The remaining summer of 2012 will be filled with nothing but poems, poems and some more lame poems..

You can comment and I'll accept the following things:

• Requests for poems
• Hate mail
• Cash, DD, Cheques etc
• Appreciation
• Jokes

Be ready for the REAL poetry. 

BUT BUT BUT, Betwixt and Beyond is not a blog entirely dedicated to the field of lame poetry, I will think of something else to do with this..maybe.

Ciao!

TheRandomThinker :D

Les Poèms Lämes Volume II Part I

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And again! I didn't have anything to do in March after the pathetic class XI results..

Hence began Volume II..

Also, after publishing Part II of Volume II, I'll be coming up with new (!!) work! So brace yourselves! :D

March 8, 2011


22:58
It's a long lonely night..
Nobody's in my line of sight.
The results are out..
The quiet voices are way too loud..

23:07
What has happened to the 'next generation'?
Maybe everybody needs salvation..
Why can't they just get over 'it'..
With more important things they should sit..

23:10
With optimism I'm filled..
One day it's gonna get you killed..
I know that didn't make sense..
However, I used the correct tense!

23:32
What the fuck is wrong??
Why are my messages (to send)taking so long?
Something's wrong with vodafone..
Huh..maybe they just need a loan.

23:34
Uh..I've got the news so NOT great,,
That I'm even recieving replies very late!
My fans,in this way, must not be troubled..
Or the vodafone headquarters will be in rubble! X-(

23:37
My efforts are definitely not going in vain..
Writing such poetry is not a pain..
It is an art well admired..
By those who don't wanna be fired..:p

23:42
Beautiful reactions I finally recieve..
Ah! Those beautiful ideas we conceive..
I thank all my fans..
Advice: in summers,Refrain from getting a tan..

March 9, 2011

00:16
On special request of Srishti Monga..

A poem based on 'Trust'..

Look at their crust..
Seem good enough to trust?
Look deeper, look closer..
Is it still the same 'simple and sober'?
Test it, manifest it..
Are you sure it's not made up shit?
Still the same plain Jane?
Well, why shouldn't you be game?
Still the same as they were..
Even after you pushed them off shore?
This is the person you should befriend..
Leave aside all
Go ahead..trust, play, comprehend..

21:17
Requested by Amogh Dhar, a poem titled :
'My Last Poem'

I wonder what my last poem's gonna be like..
It might be boring or sad..
Or Could even turn out to be a delight..
The day I give up writing poetry..
It will be the end of world's symmetry..
For your compliments, I send 'thanks'..
I couldn't care less for the 'Not my fans'..
Life is what you make it..
It'd be better to stir..than to shake it..
Though I've kinda run out of rhymes..
But 'Les Poèms Lämes' will still shine..


March 10,2011

23:43
Poems today I'll write none..
'cuz tomorrow is the rise of the new sun..
Class 12 comes calling..
Careful! Save yourself from falling..

March 11, 2011

22:18
Requested by Arshiya, a poem on her.

So unexpected are people's natures..
Which Sometimes do and at times don't suit their stature..
However, with her beautiful curls
Arshiya..one of the best girls..:)
One not to be negative with..

An honestly sweet girl is not a myth..
To have fun she loves to the core..
But her friends, she loves even more..
I thank her for being so cute..
And for sharing her food..:D

22:28
On request of Oshin..a poem on pharmacy!

I don't know a single thing..
Pharmacy..of science..is a wing..
Oshin, you suggested a theme..
Of which my knowledge is lean.

Pharm or farm..
Call it whatever..it does no harm,,
Something stupid to do with drugs..
Which she drinks in big big mugs..

Even though I don't care..
Oshin is sick of pharmacy's share.
Eating her time it is..
Not making things easier..for her first kiss..

Be patient, choose sedation..
That my friend,.would be my suggestion..
In your exams..you will do well..
Or maybe..the pharms can just go to hell..

22:43
Muhahaha!
Kidding I was..
You can just say say 'kaash'..
My last poem will never come..
Even if you pray 6 times infinity plus infinity ka sum..
But if my friend..you said 'she shouldn't.'..
To you..my dear..'of course..i wouldn't..'..

March 12, 2011
22:39
So..I just read this thing..
Which said 'poems should be'..
Huh..I like my style better..
I start with a capital letter..
Crystal clear my poetry is..
Through and through..the shiz..
The rules and preconceptions don't even matter..
Theirs or mine? I'd prefer the latter..
Chocolate cake or apple tart..
None is better than my art..:D

23:42
Lying takes you nowhere..
Maybe a dead jungle with none to care
Shout you will, till you voice is coarse..
Not a friend will acknowledge the source./
The white lies might be excused..
The forgiveness though..could even be refused..
With care and caution..one should lie..
The care and trust must not die..

23:53
Suraj had a problem with the last poem..So:


I must clear the air..
My last poem was a bit unfair..
'Never lie' is not what I meant..
With lying, some problems can be dealt..
Clever and shrewd, like a fox..
The lies can be passed of as normal talks..
That does the trick..
To find your crime no way should click..

March 13, 2011

23:59
So here's some news..
A little changed are my views..
The computer seems uninteresting..
And the phone very unaddictive..
It's time for the flower to bloom..
'cuz 12th Boards are coming soon..:D

March 14, 2011

20:39
Good luck poem for Oshin:

Since your exams start from tomorrow..
Your soul is going to be drowned in sorrow..
However, try being a this-worries-me-not..
And by the dumb questions..don't get caught..
After the exams, you can rest..
Till then..my wishes..All the best! :D

22:44
Lose determination is a habit so evil..
So thought, Jonathan, the seagull..
He flew and flew and flew..
Over the seas and the winds that blew..
A highly overpriced stupid little book..
That it recieved our evil look..
However, it's no more our kind..
11th is so out of our mind(s)..

Les Poèms Lämes (Night Three)

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VOLUME I

Night Three

January 13, 2011

01:10

A certain someone commented

“You rhyme ‘cuz you have no balance decremented”

That insult I could not bear

But with grace, it was accepted, hear oh hear!

01:15

Background music to life I desire

So that for eternity, we could set the stage on fire

But alas! That wish will not be fulfilled

Since the fire could get someone killed

01:17

The hopes you have that I’d stop are so ugly

That their chances have gone to play rugby..

The fact was and remains

That I, be the mistress, of ‘Les Poèms Lämes’

--Interruption--

*Silence*

12:45 pm

For last night, I send an apology..

The following had been the chronology

My mother had taken my cell..

Hence, you see, my poems I could not tell..

07:10 pm

It is with great displeasure I announce,

That Volume I has almost completed its rounds..

Tomorrow’s night being the last

Then, ‘Les Poèms Lämes’ will cease to fast..

Five nights in a row..

You must’ve had to adjust your bow..

Tomorrow’s the time for ‘tc..cia..byeezzz’

And we shall continue with our liezz..

---End of Night Three---

January 23, 2011

23:14

Seems like somebody sang a lullaby..

Which made everyone slip into a lie..

Except the poetry’s queen..

Who’s thinking of turning mean..

* * * * * * * END OF VOLUME I * * * * * * *

And finally! The end of volume I.

Texting poems to all the awesome people I know and destroying their nights was one hell of an 'experience'. This in no way was the end of my poems..cuz EVIL never dies!! >:)

Les Poèms Lämes (Night Two)

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VOLUME I

Night Two

Here goes the Night Two of my amazingly awesome poems! 

January 12, 2011

00:15

Now the time has arrived

When my poems will be hyped

Teachers, students, parents alike

Will not be able to rhyme with pride

00:17

Today a special I’ve introduced

I will take requests from my fans

To let this be continued

I must not let my mind be unmute

00:21

Requests for poems

On their favorite topics

Or requests for silence

Which might or might not go unnoticed

00:25

Request by Srish, on Love:

Love, love oh love

Gosh! You’re such a stupid dove

Whatever has happened to my sense of humour?

Anyway, it’s time to woo her!

00:29

I dare, I challenge, I ask

Is there anyone as good with this task?

My mastery comes from within

The lovely beauty of my sin..

00:35

For Utk:

People are so moody..

They send a message..’dudeeyyy?’

Then they disappear forever and ever..

But the ever’s 2 dozen hours..

Yes, they’re that clever..

00:40

Les Poems Lames continue to rock!

Destroying all the lovers of pop!

Yo baby! Let’s hip and hop

Oh no! Run! There comes the cop.

00:48

It’s time for some appreciation

Ladies and gentlemen, some simplification

The world goes round and round..

But that couldn’t save it from californication..

01:09

Requested by Ashish, On himself:

The poet likes my creation

Ah! That sends me into elation!

His works continue to inspire me

The question never arises, to be or not to be?

The ‘gora chitta’ Bengali

Who can ever defeat Bernoulli

Can make you feel comfortable

In any situation that may or may not be imaginable.

The advertisement for subscription:

To you comes a message

That will make bodies turn intheir wreckage

The chance to destroy your nights and days

By subscribing to ‘Les Poèms Lämes’

If you want to have a look

Just open your phone book

Send a text to this number

And see with your own eyes, Le Grand Blunder!

---End of Night Two---

Les Poèms Lämes

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VOLUME I

Night One

WARNING: Do NOT look for sense in these poems. You have been warned.

ENJOY! :D

January 10, 2011

23: 45 pm

Uh. I am bored.

Nobody's awake.

So I'll pen this rhyme.

Just for my sake.

Do not mind.

If you cannot find.

A reason for this note.

Just carry on with your boat.

23:48

I know the last one sucked

But that's because my poems are completely fucked.

It's very obvious the following must happen..

All poets should have me eat a poisoned apple.

23:58

I'm trying to make more

But it's such a chore

Bah! Poetry is such a bore

This winter has made my throat sore.

January 11, 2011

00:20 am

Sometimes how I wonder

What had led to such a blunder?

Cinderella left her glass shoe..

Just out of the blue??

-----Interruption----

00:23

Ocean:

I am sitting on my chair

Isn't it unfair?

Donald duck gets the share..

Why do I even care?

00:24

Me:

It is your state

To take the bait

It could have been worse

Had it not been for the curse.

00:27

Ocean:

Here comes the nurse

Give her the purse

She wants to go surf

If you don't, she'll burp

00:29

Me:

Dude, you're so insecure

It is time you be assured

That my poems are so punk

That nothing could be more fucked.

00:32

Ocean:

Well, mine sucked more

Look at that whore

Even she looks a bore

Let's see what's next in your store.

00:34

Me:

To realize it is time

That I can make anything rhyme

I am the best at the fight

Yes, you might wanna take my life.

00:55

Ocean

Wait and watch as I shatter your pride

You'll leave your home on a camel ride

Brad Pitt's got a new wife

The day I died was the best day of my life.

00:57

Me:

You are such a cheater

You took the song and put it in a heater

The crime will make you pay dearly

Unless you state the reasons very clearly.

01:02

Ocean:

We can put the songs anywhere

It's a democratic country my dear

So, you better shut your mouth

Or go, settle in the south

01:03

Me:

You lowly being,

Are challenging my authority

You must already be seeing..

The scene of your platelets' minority..

01:13

Ocean:

My blood cells are normal

Yes, I do have friends who're abnormal

One of them loves playing with pencils

But the truth is, she deserves to wash utensils..

---End of Night One---